Just a Simple Truth I Wanted to Write About :)

Lately, I have struggled with the idea of being perfect… What?! No girl ever struggles with that, right? (sarcasm). And I have got to say God has been showing me ways to release this anxiety in me. To live life in peace with being perfectly imperfect. 

And God has shown this to me by being sick a lot this semester...

I came into this semester with mono… then I got strep… then I got a cold… then I got better… then as I am writing this I have a cold again. Seriously, what gives?! I take a one-a-day vitamin and try to eat fairly healthy (although sometimes eating a half jar of Nutella is too tempting! J) so why do I keep getting so sick? Well, I still do not know the answer but getting sick again has reminded me of what God has shown me through it. 

Soooo…. It started with sleeping through one of my first Greek classes this semester because I was sick. And if you go to OBU, you know that you NEVER miss Greek class because it’s like an implied competition once you enroll (dramatic). But after I missed that class, (Warning: this is ridiculous) I cried sporadically throughout the day! My boyfriend had to tell me “Get some perspective! Are you taking Greek as a competition or because you genuinely want to read the Bible in Greek?” (P.S. I am thankful for his bluntness, haha!) If I was honest with myself at the time, I would have to say the former… but since then, this has definitely changed. It changed because I realized sickness was not in my control but my attitude about it  is; I can choose to be anxious or I can choose to do the best I can. And really, learning Greek should not and is not a competition! 

What has really changed this anxiety is really embracing that God has only used ONE perfect being in history to fulfill His will; and that was Jesus. Other than that, God has used imperfect beings since the Garden of Eden to put together the Bible and spread the gospel (I mean C’mon read the Book of Acts, PAUL BEFORE HE ACCEPTED JESUS KILLED CHRISTIANS!) God uses the imperfect for His perfect will. God just wants us to be faithful.

Not to say that we should not pursue God’s righteousness and seek to please him through our actions but we should not be anxious. He says in the Sermon on the Mount to not be anxious about ANYTHING, that even when we make mistakes to keep moving. And being sick is nothing in my control, so there is no need to be anxious about missing that Greek class. Ultimately, no one was disappointed in me that day; I put that pressure on myself.

So three truths I have been telling myself to counter my anxieties about failure are:

I am a daughter of the one true high King.

I will always keep going even when it is hard.

I am always willing to learn

For some reason, those three simple truths have been making my life a little more peaceful lately so I thought I would share!

So I challenge you to write on piece paper:

I WILL NOT BE ANXIOUS ABOUT _________

And then write three truths about yourself.

Not saying that I have the ultimate way to get rid of anxiety about failure but I am just trying to extend this blessing to you all!

So moral of the story is, don’t take Greek as a competition… Take it because you want to genuinely know the Bible.

In other words, life is not a competition stop comparing yourself to others and causing anxiety. But, follow God’s plan that he has set for you not the person sitting next to you.

An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.

-Proverbs 12:15

Thanks for reading this random blog post!

Karlie 

Just Do It

It’s a new year, so pause and take a deep breath.

…I am guessing you needed that, especially after the holiday season.

Even after having a long Christmas break, I feel as if life is only getting faster and I just cannot believe that 2012 is already over!

As always around New Year’s Day, it is a time to reflect on the previous year and see areas that need improvement and areas that have had significant growth. That’s what makes the new year so magical - because it feels like a new start. A new year gives us the optimism of new changes while previous year becomes only a memory.

So, around this time people are making New Years resolutions or attempting to keep the ones they have already made and I thought I would write a blog of encouragement. 

I was talking to a good friend the other day and she spoke about a change that she wanted to make within herself. She wanted to change her daily walk with God and become more intentional about spending time with Him everyday. She broke down and said:

“I want to become rooted in the word so I am the iron that sharpens iron like it says in the bible [Proverbs 27:17]. I want to be able to encourage my friends like they encourage me”

While she was confessing this to me, you could tell the deep burden she was carrying because of this.

It seemed like she felt inadequate to go before God and that it would be impossible for her to make a change.

And, basically what I am here to say is that is a lie.

The more we dwell on the fact of what we are not doing, the more it is going to cripple us from actually doing.

I told her that even if she just reads one scripture a day, it is a start!

I haven’t written a blog post in months and sometimes I will beat myself up about that because I enjoy doing it but life seems to get in the way. Then I have to snap out of it and realize there is no better time to start than now. And if I don’t end up writing a blog post next month or even in a few months, at least I am making a start.

So whatever New Years resolution you have made, whatever healthy choice or habit you are pursuing, just do it. Like Kathryn always tells me when I am over whelmed with school:

“How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.”

So breathe and go for it. And if you mess up for a day, week, month, or even months, pick yourself back up and remember that everyday can be January 1^st; everyday can always be a new beginning.

Here are some encouraging verses to read and memorize:

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! – 2^nd Corinthians 5:17

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. – Philippians 3:14

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. –Galatians 5:1

Thanks for reading!

Karlie

The Words of a Father

Last night my suite mate and I watched the movie, “Footloose”—not the 80’s version but the newer one. As odd as it may seem, the Holy Spirit really spoke to me through it.

The story is based in a town that three years prior had suffered the loss of five teenagers in a car accident after a dancing party. To keep the town together in the aftermath of this tragedy, the town had acted to ban dancing city-wide at the leading of a local pastor who had lost a son in the accident. The movie centers on this pastor’s daughter and her rebellion against him in response to her brother’s death and her overall confusion about life.  Her father had worked to minimize turmoil in the town, yet had neglected to face the turmoil in his own home.

First of all, I can say humbly and honestly that I have been in situations similar to the girl in the movie. Who hasn’t endured personal hardships that stir confusion?

One scene toward the end of the movie tied it all together for me. In this scene, the students decide to hold the senior dance on the outskirts of town where it is legal. Ultimately, the father hesitantly approves of his daughter’s decision to attend. In order to display his support, he announces his support to the church during a Sunday sermon and buys her a corsage. It all culminates when he proudly hugs her and tells her she is his angel.

At this point in the movie, I’m crying over three things:

1.     My dad was not alive to send me off to my prom

2.     Dennis Quaid (the dad in the movie) was my father’s celebrity look-alike.

4.     This father is showing his daughter love no matter how far she has wandered. And you see that the fathers words of love and encouragement deeply impact her.

      We in the same way should feel impacted when our heavenly father pursues us despite our failures.

       Jesus says through the parable of the lost sheep that he would leave the 99 sheep just to find the lost one. The father of the movie does something similar by risking the disapproval of the whole town to support his daughter. 

 God never fails to find me like the lost sheep and the wandering rebellious daughter. This is always more evident when I am going through a season of confusion about my faith and future. God at the hardest moments speaks incredible love over me that couldn't ever be described with words or writing.

 Because even as upsetting it is to not have my father, the words of Jesus will better than any words that my dad could have ever expressed at my prom. And I realize that more than longing for words from my father at prom, I long to hear Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant”while feeling an overwhelming peace of being found, known, and loved by God.  In that moment I know I will be fully accepted into the kingdom to worship Him eternally. 

Really what moment could be greater?

Thanks for reading!

Karlie  

The Caring Center

The Caring Center at First Baptist Church Tulsa is a place where they hand out free food and clothes to people in need. This ministry, which serves homeless and low-income families, runs completely off volunteers and prayer. Since my return from India, I have volunteered there as consistently as possible.  It has shown me that people in need are right in front of me; people who look the same, speak the same language, eat the same kind of food, and wear the same kind of clothes. They are American citizens that live in Tulsa, Oklahoma exactly like I do. For years I had fantasized about all the different countries I would visit to care for the poor and needy in Christ’s name. It hit home that I was neglecting people I could help now.

But more than anything, working at the Caring Center brought some real perspective and truth into my life.

There were many jobs I did at the Caring Center, but my favorite job, of course, was clothing shopping. When I did this job, I would take the clients through the Caring Center’s clothing section and help them choose their outfit. But it was more than just helping clients choose their clothes, it was getting to know them and hearing their stories. And since it is affiliated through the church, my favorite part was being allowed to pray with each person and family. Everyday I worked I could see God intertwined in everything around me, and I am so thankful for all that I have been able to experience.

But one day in the midst of the busyness I neglected to recognize a truth that God was trying to teach me.

When clothes-shopping that day, I was assigned to help a particular homeless woman. She was very talkative and had strong opinions about things. And not surprisingly, due to this extremely hot weather, she was very exhausted. So, it called for a lot more patience and empathy than usual.

While we went to the back and looked through clothes, I tried to ask her about her life so I would know things I could pray about with her. Once we got all the basic items I was ready to be finished, but being done was the last thing on this woman’s mind.  Everything she got didn’t satisfy her because she kept asking for more and more. While I was being very lenient and generous with our items, it got to a point where I had to end the shopping because of the many clients waiting to shop after her. About 15 minutes after she left, she came back again to ask me for even more things! On top of everything she had already received, she asked for a blanket, baby shoes for her granddaughter, a hat, a belt and many other items. And in addition to that, she was asking for these things while I was helping other people on this very busy day. So as you can imagine, my patience started to run a little more thin than usual.

And when I responded with a polite, “Ma’m I am not sure if I can give you much more” she would scrunch up her face and give me an upset response. Even though I was frustrated, I still found a way to meet some of her needs in a kind way. At that point, what I really wanted to do was throw my hands up and say, “I have made A LOT of exceptions for you! Can’t you just be satisfied?!”

Looking back now, I find it quite humorous. Not because of the lady’s need or the odd situation, but because of my attitude and thinking about the predicament.

This lady’s attitude toward the Caring Center is exactly how my attitude is toward God.

God has given me everything for free, but I still ask for more! He even gave the biggest gift of all, HIS ONLY SON! I always want to be doing or receiving something new instead of being content on what God has already provided. He continues to give me multiple blessings, but I go to him as if none are satisfying.

And on top of that, I am not at all different than the lady I helped at the Caring Center.

I am not entitled to more.

I am not loved by God more.

I am not more deserving than she is.

I am nothing more than she is, I am exactly the same.

So, why do I go to God as if I am? As if I am more deserving? 

It is my human tendency, I guess.

But it makes me thankful that God still uses me despite all the flaws that I have found (and some of the ones I haven’t!) about myself.

He is just that good; He uses the ordinary to do the extraordinary.

Thanks for reading!

Karlie

India Post #3

Hey, fellow blog readers, sorry for the delay on the 3^rd and last India post. I have just been so busy! This summer has been full with volunteering at FBC Tulsa’s Caring Center everyday (there will be a blog post about that next month!), being a sponsor at Falls Creek, going to an insane amount of wedding events, and so much more! But in the midst of this craziness, I have not forgotten to write this last post so I can conclude and summarize my thoughts about my adventure in India.

This story describes two 14 year-old girls at a particular village that I met. Their names were Gomitee and Comez and their stories will stay with me forever.

This was a day in the villages, and after my group and I performed our skit we spoke to the crowd. Fortunately, Gomitee and Comez knew a little English so I was able to talk with them and ask simple questions when they eagerly approached me. They began to teach me words in their language, which then caused a lot of giggles due to my terrible accent.  It was obvious that both were just regular teenage girls that loved to be silly. Once the conversation progressed I started to ask more questions, one being “How many family members do you have?” One answered with none and the other answered with one sister, but neither mentioned any parents. Wondering, I said, “Mother? Father?”

Both answered with a simple, “No. Both are gone.”

I already knew this was a not-so-fortunate village, but I didn’t expect two young girls with no parents at all. I then explained to them in easy English that I too had lost my father at a young age. I described how the man we spoke about in skit, Jesus, helped me through it. I told them how Jesus did even more by taking away the shame of my own mistakes. They seemed very interested so we carried the conversation about Christ as long as we could until other things distracted us. Knowing that I all I can do is plant seeds, I understood the next part was just to pray for them even after leaving India.

The craziest part is that later I was introduced to the sister of one of the girls, and it turns out that she has a mental disability. In spite of this, at 18 years of age the sister cooks, cleans, and makes enough money to put both of the 14 year-old girls in school. Incredible! What an example of selfless love! One of the girls is not even her own blood sister! I wish my heart was at a point to give of myself like that. At such a young age this sister understands Christ like humility more than most people do, myself included.

So what does this bring me to when concluding my India blogs? Only one word rings in my head, Freedom:

·      Freedom from AIDS

·      Freedom from corrupt government

·      Freedom from poverty

·      Freedom from devastation

·      Freedom from fear

·      Freedom from chains

·      Freedom from our own destructive selves

Going to India put in perspective deep oppression, but even more it brought to my attention the oppression I was blind to right in my own home country.

It is easy to say that India is a country yearning for freedom, but can’t we just as easily say that America is too? Think about the Aurora, Colorado shooting last week. Everyone needs freedom from something that holds us down in this world. It is discouraging to see the hurt around us and just wonder why it all happens.

I too, like everyone else, am yearning for freedom--freedom from insecurity, worry, hate and so much more. Ultimately, I want freedom from my own sin. 

But there is an answer and it is Jesus. Cliché I know, but that is the truth. Let’s just thank God it is as simple as calling on his name and asking for forgiveness. 

This life is short and may include some thick and heavy chains but there will be a day in heaven when we see Jesus face to face and he will say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” And we all can sing in unison “Free at last, free at last.”

Thanks for reading!

Karlie

India Post #2

Sorry I wasn‘t able to post this last night like I promised (The Thunder game was just so intense!) But, I finally put it together. This post is definitely not as emotionally stirring as the last but it is a great example of faith that I feel as Christians we should take note of.

When my team and I commuted to a different province with many villages, we were able to speak with commercial sex workers, pimps, and lower/middle-class people about Jesus. (There are many stories I will tell about these visits later on!) The village life was very different from the city life in India. And I feel like going to more rural areas of India helped me capture the essence of Indian culture. But apparently as we were visiting this province in India there was a lot of political uprising happening. And this wasn’t any typical political conflict. What had happened was the political leader in that province was a devout Christian but was assassinated in a plain crash. This naturally led his son to be the next leader rising to power. But just like his father, he as well was a strong Christian. He also did very good things for the community and so many people loved him. But due to his faith he has been persecuted with false accusations and taken to jail. Because of this, it has started riots in that very region we were ministering in. So my group and I had to stay indoors to be safe, especially since we would attract attention because of our nationality. So as we were staying indoors we tuned in on the news and the Indians housing us translated what was being said.  And at one point the mother of this Christian political leader said, “My God knows my sons heart and my God is much stronger than what is happening.” Wow! What a testament of the power of God. It just shows that the Lord is working in powerful ways in India and I was blessed enough to witness it. The man that has been persecuted was also caught on the news getting out of a car with security saying “God Bless” to all of his loving citizens. He is on public television being falsely accused because of his religion but still has not given up his faith in God and his kindness towards others. I feel like there was no way I could not come back to America and share this great example with fellow Christians.

My team and I, soon after staying indoors, took the long way back around the province to the city to insure our safety. Prolonging the trip from 2 hours to 5 hours!

All of the riots I was caught in during my time at the villages really put in perspective the fear that is in that culture. I have had a lot of people ask me if I was ever felt scared of being in danger over there and I say, “Of course I was!” But it taught me to put my trust in God and in the nationals he provided for me. Something terrible could have gone wrong but what an example of the power of God that nothing didn’t. And even if something were to have gone wrong, like the persecuted political leader, I would still put my faith in Jesus.

“Therefore, brothers, in all our distress and persecution we were encouraged about you because of your faith.” 1 Thessalonians 3:7

Thanks for Reading!

Karlie

India Post#1

“I am just following the story that the Author is writing”

This is a quote that has stuck with me ever since 2010, when I overheard a leader say it on my trip in China. I knew he meant it as God is writing this magnificent story that no human has control of. That we don’t know when, where, how, and who the spirit of Jesus will touch but we should just be his faithful followers that deliver the message.

That quote became very real to me on my India trip. It was heart breaking, uncomfortable, and tiring being over there and working with women and children whose lives have been affected by sex trafficking or HIV/Aids. But regardless, God has a story he is writing and I am just following the lines. And even if what has happened to these women is unfair and unjust, God has a plan. A BIG plan, of which I am only snippet.

There are many stories I would love to share about India but since it would take up approximately twenty pages of my blog, I am condensing it to a only a few that I will post within the next couple of days (so, I guess you could call it a series!). And due to the nature of the people my team worked with, I will not be disclosing the names of the organizations.

So we will call the first story's organization “Organization A.”

1.) Organization A is Christian based organization that works with HIV/Aids victims who are about to die, both adults and children.  Many HIV/ Aids victims in India are disowned by their families because of the honor/shame aspect in the culture. So this organization houses victims, has counselors, nurses, and cooks provided, and has services to tell about the hope found in Jesus. They even try to mend family relationships. This organization does a great job of being Christ-like. The president of the organization cleans toilets and does dirty work just as much as the next person; what amazing leadership! They also grow their own produce and have animals which the children help raise as a therapeutic outlet. It was incredible to just be on the campus. We got to see the children’s end of the summer program where they memorized scripture, danced to Christian songs, and told about what they learned. And lets just say I could not keep a single tear back. These children knew they had HIV/Aids and still sang the song  “Mighty to Save” with every ounce of their hearts. I know that song was real to them. And although young, they have a better perception of life than most adults. This is because they know this life is short, they know that Jesus saves, and they know heaven is just around the corner. These kids were the light to that organization even though the reality of death was something that faced the workers and victims everyday. They turned death around from mourning to celebrating because they would be meeting Jesus soon.

And I had the opportunity to teach these kids how to play the guitar! Mainly just a couple of simple chords (C,G,D,Em), but they soon started to learn how to play “Mighty to Save.” They were over-joyed when they combined the chords and the words of the song together. It gave me goosebumps and I wish I could worship God forever in that very moment.

Check my blog tomorrow for another story!

Thanks for reading!

Karlie